Feeling stupendously lonely tonight.

Joy.

I remember seeing something on here that went something like “I know there’s no mad alien with a blue box to take me on adventures through time and space, or a consulting detective with a long black coat who will ask me to come solve mysteries with him, or a school for witches and wizards in Scotland that will send me an acceptance letter by owl, but I still watch for them anyway.”

Normally, I’d think “Yep! That’s a total GPOY! Always gonna look out for my Doctor/Sherlock/Hogwarts!”, but tonight… it just seems all sort of… useless. I’m a 21 year old woman in college, sitting alone at a desk on a Saturday night with some knitting and a laptop to keep myself company. And I feel sad. Sad and pathetic. Because sometimes my usually boundless optimism falters, and when it does, it crashes hard. And it hurts. It really does.

So… yeah, here I am, whining to a bunch of people on the internet that I have never met in real life, hoping that someone will care.